Overcoming Anger to Recover Faster From Divorce

Are you struggling with feelings of anger and resentment after going through a divorce? 

It’s normal to have feelings like this after feeling hurt or betrayed by someone you trusted and loved, but if you want to rebuild your life after divorce and recover from the pain of divorce faster, it’s important to let go of anger and resentment as quickly as possible and here’s just a few reasons why. 

1. Emotions like anger can cause “blocks” that stop good things from happening and flowing into your life. It’s hard to let good things in and fill your cup up with all the best things and be able to rebuild your life after divorce, when you’re carrying around a cup full of all the old baggage from the past.
2. Holding onto anger and resentment is like drinking the poison and then waiting for the other person to die…it’s you that suffers – not them. Holding onto these painful emotions can steal your joy and stop you from moving on with your new life after divorce.
3. Holding onto big emotions like anger and resentment over time can cause dis-ease in the body which can potentially lead to physical problems over time if not addressed.

I have an old friend, who’s been going through a bitter divorce settlement for almost 5 years now. I’ve told her the importance of letting go of the anger, bitterness and resentment she’s had as it can cause so much damage to her health, happiness and her children…

Today I found out she has Cancer. Was it caused by holding onto those painful emotions? There is no scientific proof to say it is, but it’s an important reminder of whether it’s worth risking our happiness and health by holding onto grudges, blame and getting stuck in anger.  

Maybe you’ve been trying to let it go and haven’t been able to get rid of those painful feelings and if you’re really ready, here are 3 ways to let go of anger and resentment, so you can get on with feeling happier, better, lighter and living a life you can love again.

          1. Forgiveness – have you heard the saying…forgiveness will set you free? When you can get to a place of forgiveness, this will set you free on so many levels to feel lighter, calmer, happier and allow good things to come into your life again. Just being ready to forgive is the first step of allowing yourself to forgive and if you aren’t quite ready, you can bridge the gap by being willing to forgive. This will help you get to a stage where you can finally forgive and set yourself free.

          2. Change your perspective. Often when you have anger it’s because you feel like someone has done something wrong to you or caused you harm or pain. This causes a victim type of mentality where you can get stuck in blame causing you to lose your power and joy. One of the ways to shift this, is to change the way you’re seeing what’s happened.

Instead of focusing on what you feel this person has done to you or caused you to lose, shift your focus to how you’ve grown through this and the blessings that have come from what’s happened.

Even if right now this might feel like a big jump, when you can move from being a victim to a victor, seeing how the divorce has made you stronger, wiser and the blessings and opportunities that have come from it, this will help you change the way you see what’s happened and stop you from getting “stuck” in blame, anger or feeling like a victim. 

          3. Clearing the emotions from the deeper level – emotions like anger and resentment are sitting at the deeper subconscious level, which is why it can be hard to overcome them at times without the help of a professional. The fastest way to let go of these and other big emotions after going through divorce, is to work with a therapist who can clear the emotions from the deeper level using processes like NLP, EMDR or Hypnotherapy. These types of therapies can help you let go of anger through clearing it from the subconscious level, which can also help you recover from divorce faster.    

If you need help with how to overcome and recover from divorce, including letting go of emotions like anger, sadness, hurt, fear and loneliness which are common after going through a challenging time like divorce, working with a Professional Divorce Coach and Therapist can help you save years of struggling with pain and heartache and help you start moving  forward into a happier future and life after divorce.

Renae Tate is a Certified Life Coach and Divorce Coach, NLP Practitioner and Psychotherapist*, that specialized in helping people heal faster after divorce and create their dream life and relationship after divorce. https://www.dreamlifeafterdivorce.com/ ph: +61414295373 or renae@dreamlifeafterdivorce.com 

*Australia